The Dam Damn

I'm sort of drowning over here - every time I start to write something, it starts coming out awfully dark and dour and not just a little boring. So, in the name of assuring my two readers that I'm not dead, and maybe punching a tiny hole in The Writing Wall, so that all the goodness can flow forth after this, I present you with a horrifyingly labryinthine sentence and a meme. Enjoy.

Four jobs you have had:

1) Systems Administrator - Yep, I'm the IT Goddess. Whoo.
2) Waitress at Chuck E. Cheese. This mostly involved carrying large mediocre pizzas through a minefield of running toddlers and dressing up as a giant rat mafioso. Yep - I got to wear the rat costume. Actually, at the time this was a Showbiz pizza that had just been bought out/converted to a Chuck E. Cheese, so we had the animatronic redneck bear musical, a giant bear costume (yep, wore that too) as well as all the trappings of the rat place. Fun fun fun
3)Receptionist for a book company. The best part of this job was watching the folks come in with their wallets or purses all ready to go. They'd come in, get this really confused look on their faces when they'd spy me at the reception desk and then ask, "Ummm hi. Where are the books??" I'd helpfully point them out to one of our conveniently located stores. That chain (much) later got bought out by Barnes & Noble.
4)A non-waitress at a "gentlemen's club." That was an interesting year.

Four movies you would watch over and over:

1)The Ref
2)Gone with the Wind (oh shut up)
3)The Usual Suspects
4)The Replacements (again, shut up - I have a weakness for sports movies)

Four places you have lived:

1)New Orleans, Louisiana
2)Baton Rouge, Louisiana
3)Austin, Texas
4)Cleveland, Ohio (yep - right after my parents got divorced, so I was 4ish? 5? I remember going to school there, so I had to have hit 5 at some point. We only lived there for about a year - until my grandfather died, then we came back to New Orleans. I've also lived in Waco, Texas but ACK - who would admit that??)

Four TV shows you love to watch:

1)CSI (watching a re-run right now, as a matter of fact)
2)Good Eats
3)Project Runway (I admit it, I'm hooked. Santino sucks and Guadalupe wuz robbed!!)
4)Family Guy

Four places you have been on vacation:

1)Isla Mujeres, Mexico (I sooooo need to get my passport changed. ugh)
2)Key West, Florida (Actually, I've been all over Florida, but Key West was a grown-up vacation and didn't involve any hats with ears.)
3)Houston, Texas (I was a kid and we went to Astro-World, shut up. Also, when I was 8 months pregnant with kiddo, we went to Astro-World for the day and I lasted longer than anybody else. HA!)
4)Georgia (kid vacation, grandmother was on a cave kick, so we wandered all over Georgia, checking out caves. It was actually pretty damn cool.)

Four websites you visit daily:

1)IMDB I don't know why, but I seem to need to look something up on this every damn day.
2)My bank website - I love watching the bill monsters eat my money.
3)Go Fug Yourself, because God-DAMN
4)Amazon. I like to window shop, what can I say?

Four of your favorite foods:

1)Cheeseburger and fries
2)This weird variation on a carbonara that I make when I'm at home alone and feeling depressed
3)Shake 'n bake porkchops with white beans and rice. Just trust me - this is a meal my grandma made and it still makes me happy
4)My grandma's red beans and rice. Nobody makes 'em like this woman.

Four places you would rather be right now:

Well, I'm at home, in the comfiest pants I can still wear out in public, a big sweatshirt that hides the whole braless thing, and these wonderful socks that I got for Christmas. My only real problem is that I'm currently out of wine. Anyway - how about 4 places that I love to be?

1)On my back porch, with a bottle of red and a new (to me) book
2)On a warm beach
3)At my dad's house, hanging out with my family
4)Wandering through a bookstore with lots of money and time