Zzzzzzooooooommmmmmm

The last couple of weeks, broken down:

Busy
Tired
Tired
Cranky
Busy
Busytiredcrankytiredbusycrankybusy

Sick

I'm mostly better now. There's still a glue factory operating in my head, but production seems to be slowing. Soon all the little laid-off glue factory workers will wander out of my cranium with their little metal lunch pails in search of another job.

Um.

So listen, if you go to Smiley-Mart and you buy a 12-pack of regular Coke and a bag of mini Snickers and a box of diet pills guaranteed to burn belly fat? I'm going to judge you.

If you come in and buy a James Bond DVD, bubbles and a pack of underwear, I'm going to entertain myself by imagining you - sitting around in your new boxer briefs, reciting the good bits of "Diamonds are Forever" while blowing bubbles in your darkened living room. OK? Deal with it.

You, sir? The one who comes in every week and buys a pack of athletic socks and a pair of very large women's dress shoes? I try not to think about what you're doing.

You, cute Army guy, who comes to the express line and gets frustrated because we never have your cigarettes by the carton? Come back. I'll tell them to restock. You're pretty. You're also heartbreakingly young and if you're shopping at Smiley-Mart, it means you're not getting shot at in Iraq.

You, parents who bring your toddlers in at 10PM and then wonder why they're cranky? Are you on crack? Oh...nevermind.

Speaking of cranky children, I'm always sort of amazed by the fact that there's this other person living in my house. You'd think, after 15+ years, I'd be used to the concept, but it obviously takes me a while to catch on. She still sort of blindsides me sometimes with all of her otherness.

She's not even remotely the kid I thought I'd have at this point. I'm not disappointed at all - she's amazing. But I look at her and go "huh, so that's how you turned out....cool." The ex and I referred to her as The Science Project when I was pregnant and now that seems really appropriate. Here is The Science Project at Stage 15 - Adolescence.

Anyhoodles. I'm still sort of in the busy/cranky/tired phase of things, but I felt like popping in to say hello. So - hello. I'm off to save the world, or at least this little tiny, furniture-based, digital bit of it.

Sanitized kisses.