Boom! Crash!

Some of you may have been wondering why I haven't updated in a while. Of course, some of you probably don't give a shit and the rest of you have probably long wandered off, in search of something more interesting or perhaps a snack. Might I suggest Fritos and cheddar cheese? They go surprisingly well together.

Anyway - I haven't updated lately, because every time I sit down to write, all that comes out is complaints. I am just not doing all that great lately. I am overwhelmed at work, I am overwhelmed in my personal life and I'm just not handling it well.

And if I hear one more person say "but you're getting maaaaarrieeeeeed" when I tell them that I'm not doing all that well, I swear to ever-lovin' God, I will punch them in the damn neck. Sweet Jesus.

Yes, I am getting married. Eventually. But until then, I'm waiting. I'm waiting for Jef to find a job, I'm waiting for Jef to move down here, I'm waiting for this, I'm waiting for that, I'm waiting. I'm not over here, picking out colors and napkins and place settings. Of course, I probably wouldn't do a whole hell of a lot of that anyway, but you get my point.

I tried to get all wound up in the "maaaaaaarrieeeeeeed" part of things, but I couldn't, and do you want to know why? It's not because I'm not happy about the idea of getting married to Jef - I'm thrilled to death about it. It's because I don't know when it's going to happen. I'm goal-oriented, people, and right now I'm working without a goal!! I have no deadline!! And it's making me feel a little listless and sad and hopeless. So can it with the "maaaaaaaaaaaarrieeeeeeeeeeeeeed" crap, 'cause really all that does is make me want to cry! I have a blank wedding planner and some pretty material and a gorgeous pattern all sitting in a box, waiting to spring into action whenever my boy moves down here, but frankly, until he does, I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT.

NEXT SUBJECT

I got rear-ended a week ago, and goddammit, I don't want to talk about that either, stupid teenaged driver and his goddamned excuses and now my trunk is held shut by a fucking bungee cord and my bumper's all cracked and shit and I have to file through MY insurance because, I don't know, maybe I copied a number down wrong and goddammit, little punk goes to my daughter's school and fuckin' hell.

I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT.

NEXT SUBJECT

Work. Sucks. Servers. Everywhere. Software. Not. Working.

AUUUGHGHGHGHUUGHGHHGHHGHGUGHGHGH

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I rammed my little toe into a UPS at work and I'm pretty sure I broke it. It was swollen to twice its normal size and purple and I could barely walk on it, so y'know, I'm thinking broken. The problem is, for a pinky toe, what do you do? Whine? Wear flip-flops? Drink heavily? Suck it up? I did a little bit of all of those. The bruising has done this weird combination of spreading into my foot and fading, it's really quite lovely. Toe's still swollen, not as hurty. Am still pursuing the drinking heavily option.

NEXT SUBJECT

Ok, finally onto something kind of amusing and interesting. Well, to me at least. Kiddo and I were running some errands the other night and she tells me, "My Latin teacher is crazy."

"Oh honey, all Latin teachers are crazy. Wait, what's her name?"
"Ms. Laetus*"
"No. Fucking. Way."
"What?"
"That was my Latin teacher in high school!"
"No. Fucking. Way."
"You're right - she's crazy....but in a good way."

*No, not her real name, but it's the only Latin word I could remember easily and it means "happy", so I thought it would be OK.