A month? Wow, I suck.

It occurred to me, as I was typing the third comment of the day on SOMEBODY ELSES'S SITE, that maybe I should spend less time writing on other people's sites and spend a little time on my own.

So hi! How are you? I'm fabulous. A tad wedding-obsessed at the moment. Which feels a bit silly, considering we have the whole other horse to put before the cart of getting Jef moved down here to worry about. Problem is, I can't really DO much about getting Jef down here right now. I can't find him a job, I can't put money into his checking account (hell, I can barely keep money in my own), I can't find him an apartment. I suppose I can scope out apartments, but only he really knows his price range and what he likes and we still haven't talked about whether we'll move in together before the wedding or wait or any of that and oh my God do you have any beer? A beer would be nice, thank you.

So you see why it's so much easier to just bury myself in the pretty pretty pictures of flowers and dresses and cakes, right?? Right.

By the way, I have this thing pretty much planned in my head. Provided of course, Jef doesn't see everything that I like and think it's awful.

Hi baby, I love you - it's all just ideas and I won't be insulted if you hate it, I promise.

By the way, this is why I believe all wedding planning should take place over a plate of chili cheese fries and a pitcher of beer. Seriously, how can you disagree over shades of purple when you're wiping chili off your fingers? You can't.

OH! Which reminds. Ok, so I've always been attracted to those wedding trainwreck shows. I can't help it, it's a sickness. I like "Bridezillas" and "Platinum Weddings" and the occasional episode of "Whose Wedding is it Anyway".

Bridezillas is fairly obvious - it's like watching "COPS", only everybody's wearing tulle. "Platinum Weddings" is an opportunity for me to stand around in a wife beater and drink $5 wine and say "yew spent haaw muuuuch????" Try it, it's fun. And then "Whose Wedding is it Anyway" is just fun for a combination of both of those and the odd decorating idea.

Allright, so the point - I'm watching WWIIA and there's this bride on there who is apparently just obsessed with purple, which hi, I thought we all outgrew the purple thing in 8th grade, but whatever. She wants purple draping and purple drinks and purple blah and purple blee, etc etc, ad purpleum. So she meets with the wedding co-ordinator and the on-site people to discuss the fabric choices for the draping in the room (at which point yours truly went to the kitchen to pour a very large glass of wine) and they're talking and she's nitpicking between light lavender and very light lavender and hint of lavender ("Mah colahs are blush and bashful!!") and the voice over finally, after the longest runon sentence in the world, tells us that SEVEN AND A HALF HOURS LATER, the bride has decided on her color.

Seven and a half hours, to pick a shade of purple for tablecloths and strips of fabric for the ceiling.

Now look, I get that weddings are very important days. I get it. But seven and a half hours is a ridiculous amount of time. After 15 minutes in a shower, I start to get a little antsy, OK?? Seven and a half hours of looking at shades of purple, I would have probably lost my ever-lovin' mind.

It's purple tulle, it's one day, get some goddamn perspective.

Although, she did spend 2 hours getting the purple martini juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right, and I think *that* was time well spent.